take you home
by Myrime
Summary: Weren't you supposed to be responsible? (Weren't you supposed to be safe?) - James and falling from self-made thrones, freeverse


take you home

.

death will be knocking on your door

tonight, my dear

(and every night to come)

you are losing, don't you feel it

(did you ever have a chance?)

and you will

f

a

l

l

with your eyes wide open

and still, you're blind

.

greet him like a friend

(though you don't know what that is anymore

do you?)

_i don't know about remus, he's a – _you said

(didn't you promise once it doesn't matter?)

_it's the perfect ruse_ – dog said – _everyone will believe it's me_

(and, oh, they did)

(but sirius was used to calling hell his home

wasn't he?)

_you can trust me_ – rat said

(and it will always be his best prank)

.

weren't you supposed to be responsible?

(weren't you supposed to be safe?)

.

you know death well, don't you, dear?

you've gambled with him

t-e-a-s-e-d and _taunted_ and escaped

(not anymore)

your luck is running o u t

(and you'll go out with a bang

but now you only want to stay alive,

don't you, dead man?)

.

hold your sweet little son

one last time

_pathishair_, _squeezehishand_, _kisshisnose_

memorize his smile

(it will be his last one for a longlong while)

because while you are u^p in

[heaven]

he'll be d˅o˅w˅n in

_perfectnormalnonmagicalhell_

(he's a freak like you, my dear)

.

death smiles at you

with redred eyes

( - like your blood, don't you know)

why don't you -

(why don't you smile back?)

(why don't you greet him with open arms?)

(why are you afraid?)

why can't you die with grace

when you can't defy death at all?

.

what will it be?

will you give up e-a-s-i-l-y

will you fight with _everything_ you've got

(what little is left)

it doesn't matter, don't you know?

you are already dead

(no matter that you're still b.r.e.a.t.h.i.n.g)

.

_i'll die for you_ – they said

every single one of them

(and you be/_lie_\ved them)

because what you had was {unique}

_unbreakable_

who was there when you broke?

when you followed death

[home]

(and left hell to everyone else)

.

who is to blame, my dear

but you?

reckless sirius

(for believing he could challenge fate)

[fading] remus

(for never standing up for himself)

~little~ peter

(for being afraid)

only f-o-o-l-i-s-h you

(for being the w/ea\k link)

for taking them down

(and falling yourself)

.

why are you so s.u.r.p.r.i.s.e.d?

haven't you known long enough

you've been an _auror_, dear

an _order_ member

a _target_

(father of the ~prophesized~ child)

you've had it coming

(and [knocking] on your door)

you've been too bright

and now you

b

u

r

n

.

your end comes in ~vibrant~ green

engulfing you whole

(like the eyes you love so much)

and there's no [white] light

no stream of memories

and your last thoughts aren't of

_lovehateregret_

but of four little boys

never knowing what dying felt like

(because you were just starting to live)

.

you weren't used to losing

still thinking life's a [game]

(and you've been always on the w-i-n-n-i-n-g side)

until someone changed the _rules_

(and you can't cheat death, don't you know)

do you remember, my dear,

when you were the king?

(now it seems you were only a _pawn_, after all)

never really important for winning

never hard to sacrifice

(never worth a second thought)

.

you were never meant to be a footnote

but here you are:

forgotten

(oh, they speak of lily's [love]

_sometimes_

_never_)

they'll celebrate your death

do you hear them c-h-e-e-r-i-n-g?

do you see them living the life you'll never have?

.

don't regret a thing

don't fight it

don't –

bullshit

_don't worry lils, we're invincible_, you said

but you've always been good at lying to yourself

(and she believed you)

(and she was glad when you went into hiding)

(and she thought you were safe)

(and she'll die just the same)

.

death will guide you {home}

tonight, my dear

(and you can't even be glad that

it's all o-v-e-r

because it's just wrong)

because you were meant to be golden

now you're only cold ash

[forgotten]

* * *

><p>Thanks for reading. Reviews would make my day!<p> 


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